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Oh hello, October.

I tell everyone
I smile just because
I've got a city love
I found it in Lydia
And I can't remember life before her name
- City Love by John Mayer

October begins with rain. The sky is crying with me as my heart breaks over missing John Mayer's concert tonight at the MOA Concert Grounds. I am filling my room with his music, letting his words numb the pain of me not seeing him tonight. I almost had tickets, but things didn't turn out the way they did and now here I am, half-wishing I was there all muddy and stinky, singing along with him. (The other half of me though refuses to get wet and thanks the heavens for this "blessing.") Seriously. I really, really wanted to watch him perform live.

But then again, tonight I am comforted by the fact that for John Mayer's absence is the presence of that complicated, fleeting emotion which he sings about. Me lying in my bed right now instead of standing under the rain waiting for him doesn't make his songs ring any less true for me. His music will always be there anyway, playing in the background in the iPod inside my head, as we drive off for mojos and sip through iced teas.